I Love You

There is the physical, the emotional /intellectual and spiritual.

When I dream at night, you are there. I follow your every movement as you move about, sometimes seeming to be dancing, sometimes just in repose on a beach or asleep on our bed. I reach for you but stop short of touching you for not wishing to awaken you. Then I awake. As I transit from dream to reality I see your lovely face. We have been ‘spooning’ and I do not wish to move. My day has begun well.

Why do I hold your chair for you at the table? Yes, I know you are well able to do it for yourself but this is my opportunity to show my love even in little ways for all the many things you do for me.

When you smile and say ‘thank you’ or even when you are unaware that your presence in the room is so joyful to me, I watch as you sit, perhaps reading or when you are talking on the telephone and I hear your laughter radiating from you with love and warmth I am thrilled.

Why do I serve you first at the table? Because it is my joy to serve you and to thank God for you being in my life. I cherish what has been given to me and I show ‘thanks’ to He who brought you into my life.

Why do I listen to you so intently when you speak? I listen so that I will know your heart and of the things that are important to you. Then I am able to respond to your needs and desires. Why do I look into your eyes? Because I can look into your very core. I love what I see.

Why do I love to go shopping with you. I enjoy showing the entire world the wonderful woman I have been given to accompany me through this world’s journey everyday, every year for life. Then too, as we shop I enjoy helping to select the meals we will be preparing together and sharing together.I anticipate our time together as we sip and eat and smile.

Why do I love our physical touch? It is because we become one in body as well as in spirit. It is when we can say to one another the things we are thinking and feeling and even enjoy hearing our own words speaking aloud the things we have stored away in our heart. To hear our own words speak of our love and agree with the words and the thoughts we are expressing.

To catch the scent of you, to hear your quickened breath and to taste your lips while holding close to my heart the woman I love. I want this to never end…until we can continue this togetherness with Him.

Why do I look at you and no other woman? When I look at this colorless world I am made aware of so many lost souls looking for ‘a life’ and most of them walking about searching but not finding the ‘other half’, of their life. I have found you and there is no need to look and search any further. In you I have found joy, beauty, spirit and love. For me, there is no other. I have reason to love you with my physical heart, with my every thought in my mind and now to continue to love you in spirit.

Why do I think about these things? It’s what a happy man in love does.

This is me, it is who I am;

and that is,  As I See It.

Roy A. Lamont

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Invisible

We live in a world of the visible and the invisible. This word ‘invisible’ is most interesting. It means ‘hidden’, ‘imperceptible’ or ‘inconspicuous’ according to the Mirriam-Webster dictionary. However, it can mean a lot more depending on the context in which it is used.

Most often we think of invisible as meaning a spirit or an unseen force but there are other interpretations as well. For example, there is the very small things that go unnoticed. I remember one morning while walking my dogs that there was a small flower that had come into bloom that caught my attention. It was now no longer invisible. I stopped to examine the flower and was thrilled to see a beauty within it that was awesome. Something so tiny and intricate yet so beautiful and it was flowering and would eventually fade away without anyone being aware or taking notice of its existence and of the exquisite beauty made  by our Creator. I have since become more acutely aware of many things around me.

We often don’t ‘see’ what we see. We must develop greater awareness to appreciate what has been created and of all the things that surrounds us. Some people may appear plain or ordinary, common even, but on closer contact the spirit of the individual begins to be revealed and there may be seen an intrinsic beauty or complexity that was not immediately apparent. This may explain the attraction between two individuals that transcends and joins together two spirits independent of their physical appearance. The physical is always in a state of transition while the spirit of the inividual most always remains constant throughout life. Honest, loving and ethical as a child, so also as an adult. It is the invisible things that often matter most.

The physical is obvious while the invisible individual characteristics and attributes may require deeper attention and focus to be discerned. Since these generally remain unchanged  throughout life it is imperative you see and know the truth. That’s another reason to choose wisely when choosing a lifetime partner.

There is beauty all around us but even with eyes to see with we may miss the real beauty that is just a step away from discovery. Learn to see and observe and appreciate the wonderful universe all around you and do not miss the beauty of the spiritual world formed and fashioned and brought into existence by our loving creator.

This is …

As I See It

Married? Happy? Of Course!

Why are some marriages happy ones while others are not? There has to be a reason other than just luck or sheer accident.  Would you trust someone with no  stock market experience to invest your money? Or would you have a pre-med college student perform an operation on you?  Of course not.  It takes knowledge, wisdom and experience to achieve success in the important things in life. Why then are we surprised when so many marriages fail?  With no preparation to prepare the nuptials for this important event in their life on how to be a husband or how to be a wife we should not be surprised at the high rate of failure. We prepare for a career by diligently studying the necessary course curriculum and then proceed to find employment in that field.  Diligence, application to duty and skill at what you have chosen is vital to advancement and business success.

But how do you choose a spouse? If at first you are driven by raging hormones you may be in serious trouble.  What are the ‘things’ you should be looking for?  Let me ask you for ten characteristics you would wish your spouse would have. What would they be? Would they be physical beauty, such as hair color, good figure, athletic build, politeness, humor, intelligence,  integrity, honesty, a faith system and a belief in God? Anything else?  Or do you even care?Remember you are choosing the father or mother of your future children.

Perhaps you never thought of marriage in this way. There are some things that change and some things that do not. The things that do not change are the core values of a person. Their character for  instance, once established and developed remains with you for the rest of your life. Your intelligence, your personal code of ethics, your humor, and your faith values. Most of the others related to the physical are all subject to change. In short, you age, you wrinkle, you begin to lose your shape. If you married only for physical looks then you eventually may lose the very thing you married for.  If, however, you married and you wisely chose someone who had a strong code of moral ethics, a strong religious faith, at least moderately intelligent and had a sense of humor then you will have most of the reasons you married in the first place. Character and integrity remain while physical beauty inevitably fades away.  Subtract the beauty from the rest of the list and what you have left is almost guaranteed to be a very happy marriage.

Is that all there is?  No, I said almost guaranteed.  You may have chosen wisely  and have a spouse with all the right characteristics and values and you may still have a failed marriage.  You have to value what you have and value it above all else.  Your spouse is more important than all your other assets or social and recreational pleasures.  You must, and I say must, value your spouse over all else.  You need to have a conversation not an argument.  Sure you will disagree on certain matters but you must make your marriage your first priority.  When a man esteems his wife above his parents and a woman esteems her husband above her parents then you know that they are indeed one.

There are other reasons why marriages fail and that is finances. Living beyond your ability to pay for what you want causes much stress and bitterness.  Here is where intelligence and some common sense is necessary.   No one ever got rich by spending money on things that are totally unnecessary and that they really didn’t need, even if they would be nice to have.  What joy is there in having a newer car or bigger television set if you lie awake at night worrying about how you will pay for it, or if you have to lie there not talking to one another or not holding one another’s hands?

Lack of respect is one thing that often plays a role in the break-up of a marriage.  It’s what I call ‘rust spots’ that will show up.  As rust does, it will slowly deteriorate and destroy your marriage if ignored.  Do you husbands open doors for your wife?  Do you have a special time for one another?  Is there too much television, too much computer time away from one another?  Is it too old-fashioned to read to one another and discuss the material read?  Do you remember to thank your wife for breakfast or dinner? Do you hold her chair for her when she is about to be seated?  Do you remember her birthday and especially your anniversary?  I have always given my wife three and even four cards and placed them in several places around the house for her to find later and surprise her.  After a while it became a game and she would seek and search until she found them all. I told her I could never find one card that could tell of all the love I had for her.  One thing above all, remember to say, “Honey, I love you” and say it often while looking into her eyes.  Smile often.  It’s a great stress reliever and you’ll both feel better.

We create the world we live in day by day by the choices we make day by day.   Are you unhappy in your world? Change it.  Many have forgotten how to romance their spouse.  It was so much fun when it all began and it can be again.  You have only forgotten to continue to do it.  Return to those exciting and thrilling days while you still can. Develop a mode of living that first of all involves allegiance to the creator and nurture a faith system that advocates the sanctity of the home.  This is your world.  You are responsible for most of what happens in it.  Your Creator, your family and your country.  When you have your priorities in the right order you’ll be amazed at how everything else starts to line up in the proper order.  The little things you do to preserve your marriage now is much easier than going through the bitterness of a divorce.  Choices, choices everywhere; make the right ones now and you have given yourself a bright and glorious future.

And that is ‘As I See It’

Roy Lamont